Fearing the future

It's been much of the same the last few days. Mom hasn't been feeling that well...which means she isn't eating that well. It's so hard to see her this way. I cry everyday. She has only had three treatments so far. She has a long way to go yet...how long can she continue in this condition? I don't sleep well at all. As soon as I turn the lights out...my mind is running a mile a minute. I think about death alot. I think about my parents dying and me being all alone in this world. I don't think I'm strong enough for that. I have always relied on my parents for support in many ways. Who will I go to when I need help when they are gone? I have a brother but....he is married with a baby on the way...he has his own life and has never been the most reliable person. I think about this stuff all the time. I honestly don't know what I'll do or how I will survive when they are gone. Just the thought brings me to tears.