Good Friday? Not really.

Today is Good Friday. I hoped it would live up to its name. Sadly...it didn't. Mom had her chemo pack unhooked today. She is really weak. Tired. Couldn't get up the steps. I don't know of its the chemo doing it or what. Of course we get into another arguement about her not trying hard enough. Brian and Erin were over and witnessed what my dad and I have to deal with every day. I got so upset that I got up and stormed out.

I needed to find some peace. I went to church tonight. I have been wanting to go but never am able to make the time. I went to something called Liturgy of the Lord's Passion. Sadly....I don't really know what that means....but I went anyway. I'm sitting there looking around at all the statues and the crucifix above me and I don't know what happened but I started crying. I couldn't stop. I was embarassed. I was trying to follow along during the readings but I couldn't see through my tears. Maybe it was a release that I needed...I don't know. Despite my breakdown....I'm glad that I went. I would like to go more. I hope I can make the commitment.