Was it a prayer answered?

She passed early monday morning...about 4am. I regret that I wasn't there. I told my dad that I needed to sleep at home because I was up the prevous night with her and got no sleep. I needed to sleep so that I could go to work. She was real restless about 3am and my dad gave her a pill to calm her down. That was the last time he spoke to her. He called me about 8:30 in the morning to tell me she had died. The doctors had taken her off the blood thinners because she had urinated blood, which was why she went back into the hospital last week. I had noticed that her legs were swollen and she was breathing alittle harder. She kept saying she was going to need oxygen. I believe it was the clots that killed her and not the cancer. I prayed to God that if was not going to let her live to see her grandchild...to take her now because she didn't deserve to suffer this way. That was the one prayer he heard. What happened to all the other prayers by the countless people that prayed for her? Did those not matter?

I have the most wonderful friends ever. My house was full of people all day. I had friends bringing food over left and right yesterday and more is coming today. We made a collage for the service. She had bought a cross-stitch picture to make for the baby...but sadly it never got started. A close friend of mine is going to do finish it for her. Luckily...I had talked to my mom last week while she was in the hospital and asked her if there was anything she wanted to say to the baby. I had a notepad and wrote down what she said. I am going to print it out on nice paper and put it with the cross-stitch and give it to my brother and sis-n-law at the shower...from my mom. My brother wants to burry pictures of the ultrasound with her and we are having her hold a single white rose from baby-to-be Alexis. We are also burrying the ashes of our former dogs with her. She loved her pets. They were her babies.

I know I did everything I possibly could to help save my mom and get her to fight harder. I pray that she is watching over me. I think that will be the only way I'll get through this.

Thank you everyone...on behalf of myself and my family...thank you....for everything.